solace within

Thursday, October 26, 2006
Making Amends

Music- Crystal Ball; I think I'm just so infatuated with this song.
- Edmund; some jazz piece by my favourite singer

I'm pretty sure everyone has gone through this scenario before, but even if you haven't, at least heard of it happening to other pathatic souls? Okay. Here goes.

Part 1:
Say you have to make this major life decision. Smaller than getting married -.- (sorry I couldn't find anything less major), but bigger than deciding what to eat for lunch. Okay. Maybe something on the lines of erm deciding your cca or sth I guess.

Part 2:
Happily (or so you think), you make that bestest decision you could ever make, but it gets downright rejected in the first place. Then you get dumped to some sub-standard choice on your list. Falalala. What to do? Accept it, dumbass. grr.

Part 3:
You try to convince yourself that "hey! It ain't so bad after all. Exposure does ppl good!", but soon find that it isn't really working out.

Part 4:
HA! The last straw spills liquid on a camel's hump (breaks the camel's back lah zzz). You decide to do something drastic, somewhat like treason. For those who watch chnl55's 7pm show, it'll be like how the xu jun left the royal entourage to save the medical books. After all, it would be for the good for the people in the long run. ANYWAY, so you have to find that bloody (oops sry mrs loke) yet perfect reason and exit line you desperately need to squirm out of that situation. You lose an entire night's sleep over it and fall sick the next morning, but still can't get to rest. You keep holding your breath (literally) whenever you think of it and you feel your heart beating as fast as a bee's and it starts to burst against your chest, but still, there's nothing you can do. This whole thingy may seem childish to others, but they don't understand the politics and social effects of it. No matter what, you KNOW, just KNOW that it's time to want out.

Part 5:
Crap. Just heck them all. Like what she said,"YOU LIVE FOR YOURSELF. THEY CAN'T FORCE YOU!" That coming from the mouth of a victim is the sole source of my strength I live by.

God, please give me the strength I need to carry through.
Phil 4:13- I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. (: So memorising verses do help huh. x)

I mumbled to myself not to mumble ever again- 7:55 PM

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